Life is a catch up game.

Been awhile since I've added to this, No lie I have tried. I have sat down so many times and when I reread what I wrote it just came across too negative for my taste.

Here is some truth about streaming and what the Vaz has been going through. It's tough, I'm not sitting here wanting a tap on the back, or a oh poor you. But I want to be straight.

When it's good its real good! And its great still now but sometimes even though everything you worked for is going the way you want it too life just wants to push you in other directions.

I spend a lot of time off stream working on the stream. Sending out emails, getting access to games before hand, making sure everything is up to date cuz trust me someone will notice. The hardest part is the human interaction behind the scenes. Am I spending enough time visiting streams? Am I spending enough time responding to every message? Its always hard to tell.

The point of all this is that all the time used on streaming has to come from somewhere else. A lot of people do not seem to realize this when they get into streaming or have a streamer they enjoy hanging out with. Many streamers have full time jobs, Families and friends to keep up with. Every moment a streamer spends streaming, gaming, sending emails is time that is not spent on whats truly important. Remember that. Either for yourself or that streamer your hanging out with.

I have found myself in a rut lately and after this weekend I was able to get myself out of it. Before this last weekend I was dragging ass, It was so hard to roll out of bed to start streaming. Its not that I did not want to stream cuz I still love this shit out of it, I just was hating this feeling of get my butt out of bed im late for work.

Waking up 30 mins before streaming wasnt giving me what i needed.. 1 more rest. 2. I love my mornings with my kids. My laziness was skipping this, 3. breakfast. So as you can imagine I was starting and feeling like a bag of turds.

Feeling like this was putting me in a bad mood, not only on stream but just all the time. I was having a real hard time with "Vaz you should play this game right now" and "Vaz im in your stream but I have to advertise the shit out mine right now." I was letting it kill the vibe, I know that and for that I am sorry. Worst part is when the stream was down I just wanted to be left alone by everyone, And let me tell you thats an impossible situation for a stay at home dad that welcomes everyone to come over when they want.

I share this with you all because as hard as I try to stay positive all the time, and share that streaming is amazing (which it is) its not as easy as sitting on your butt playing games all day. Streaming is an emotional roller coaster, And sometimes those downs get us all. They got me.

When your behind Life is a catch up game.

As Always never give up, if this is what you want its worth it. Its what I want. Its why I log in everyday. Hanging with you is Why I log in everyday.

To the future and overcoming obstacles of all kinds!